Because of my nationwide counseling and teaching ministry, I’m speaking to pastors and leaders in ministry on a continual basis. In discussing how to help people involved in all types of sexual sins including porn addiction and sexual activity out side of marriage, I hear, “We don’t know how to deal with it.” Look at what Apostle Paul had to say:
1 Corinthians 5 (NLT)
Paul Condemns Spiritual Pride
5 “I can hardly believe the report about the sexual immorality going on among you—something that even pagans don’t do. I am told that a man in your church is living in sin with his stepmother. 2 You are so proud of yourselves, but you should be mourning in sorrow and shame. And you should remove this man from your fellowship.
3 Even though I am not with you in person, I am with you in the Spirit. And as though I were there, I have already passed judgment on this man 4 in the name of the Lord Jesus. You must call a meeting of the church. I will be present with you in spirit, and so will the power of our Lord Jesus. 5 Then you must throw this man out and hand him over to Satan so that his sinful nature will be destroyed and he himself will be saved on the day the Lord returns.
6 Your boasting about this is terrible. Don’t you realize that this sin is like a little yeast that spreads through the whole batch of dough? 7 Get rid of the old “yeast” by removing this wicked person from among you. Then you will be like a fresh batch of dough made without yeast, which is what you really are. Christ, our Passover Lamb, has been sacrificed for us. 8 So let us celebrate the festival, not with the old bread of wickedness and evil, but with the new bread of sincerity and truth.
9 When I wrote to you before, I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin. 10 But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin, or are greedy, or cheat people, or worship idols. You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that. 11 I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a believer yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people.
12 It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning. 13 God will judge those on the outside; but as the Scriptures say, “You must remove the evil person from among you.”
1 Corinthians 6:9-20 (NLT)
9 “Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, 10 or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God. 11 Some of you were once like that. But you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
Avoiding Sexual Sin
12 “You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything. 13 You say, “Food was made for the stomach, and the stomach for food.” (This is true, though someday God will do away with both of them.) But you can’t say that our bodies were made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies. 14 And God will raise us from the dead by his power, just as he raised our Lord from the dead.
15 Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! 16 And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.” 17 But the person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him.
18 Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. 19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”
Why are we not teaching God’s Word???? Many of our young people across the nation are worship leaders on platforms, then go out of the church and are involved in ‘outer sex’ – deceiving each other saying, “We are not having intercourse so we are not having sex.” This is a lie from Satan!
Anything you do with your sexual parts is having sex!!!! You are sinning against God first and sinning against each other. You are looking and lusting and fulfilling your lust outside of God’s boundaries of committed marriage! Another issue – couples that are engaged say, “We are committed to marriage so having sex before marriage is OK.” This is another lie from Satan! I’ve been counseling the brokenness of all the above sexual sins for 24 years!
Porn addiction is 50% and above for men (including pastors) who attend church (about 34% of women). Porn leads to other sexual sins too. I’ve been counseling people addicted to porn for 24 years. I know it takes more than just prayer. Porn is a self-induced chemical addiction that is more difficult than any drug or alcohol addiction to overcome. Every person I counsel with this addiction that use porn for years and have sex with self creates a continual overload of chemical reaction in the brain that results in brain damage. It can also create ED for males.
It takes a person who is genuinely convicted in their heart that porn is sin and must be willing to repent of this sin. They have to commit to God, self, an accountable person that they are willing to do the work of rewiring the brain with God’s truth and much prayer. They have a broken relationship with God that creates a ‘lonely core’ feeling in their soul. When a person lives in sin for years and years, one prayer does not break the stronghold of this addiction. They have learned how to live in hypocrisy continually.
We live in a sexualized world. Satan has tried to destroy the world with all sexual sins. It’s time the church gets educated. Every church should be teaching on the damage of sexual sins. We should bring sexual sins out of the church ‘closet.’ We need to be teaching how to have an intimate relationship with God – inviting God in to every detail of our lives. God’s Word covers all these subjects. There are great Bible based resources to teach on these subjects.
I teach SEXUAL PURITY FOR ALL AGES for churches covering all of these issues. I teach God’s Word for churches/conferences for spiritual, relational and emotional healing and growth for all ages. I provide confidential counseling nationwide by phone/Skype for pastors and lay people – (636) 448-0121.
© Carol Clemans – March 2016
www.carolclemans.org – bio, 260 articles, teaching CD’s, DVD’s, book: GOD’S DESIGN FOR MARRIAGE. Pastor Daniel Batchelor of Dupo, IL. Is on my Bd. of Dir. of LIFE ENRICHMENT MINISTRIES, INC. (501c3).