The worldview of freedom to be sexually expressive in any fashion conceivable is being forced on all of society. The minority is saying to the majority you must accommodate my lifestyle of sexual identity and actions. This same thought by people who claim to be Christian is invading the church. Many are sexually sinning in secret forgetting God will reveal all secret sins openly in His time.
I am deeply stirred in my soul regarding what I know that is happening among us in the congregations of people who attend church weekly, baptized in the Holy Ghost and yet involved in sexual sins. I’ve been counseling 24 years. The last 12 of those years, I have provided God-based counseling by phone/Skype nationwide and to other countries. It is from being in the trenches with the hurting victims of sexual abuse, porn users and sexual activity outside the bounds of marriage that I see the influence of the world heavily impacting the church.
Yet, the church is not aggressively stepping up to the plate and providing qualified counseling for the hurting or addressing sexual issues at almost any level. God created us as sexual beings. God created the gift of sex to be a beautiful bonding experience between a husband and wife within God’s safe boundaries. In church, we are not addressing healthy sexuality and surely not addressing the ramifications of all other sexual sins.
Sexual abuse in childhood for males and females is a devastating experience at any level. It destroys the God-given gift of innocence that children have physically, emotionally and spiritually. I’m begging for an open door in churches to teach parents how to protect their children from sexual abuse. I’m begging for an open door in churches to teach on Sexual Purity for All Ages!
Our youth, teens, singles and some married people, are using porn to arouse their sexual desires and then committing sexual sins on themselves and others. When I counsel young pre-marital couples in the last ten years, I ask this question, “Are you involved in sexual activity with each other now?” Shamefully all of the couples have dropped their eyes and said, “Yes.” They are sinning against each other, God and their future marriage. What is missing among us is the teaching of God’s Word about honoring God with our bodies that were bought with His blood through redemption! (1 Cor. 6).
God is the Wonderful Counselor! His Word speaks loudly on the subject of sexual purity and the destruction of sexual sins. Sexual sins are sinning against your own body. Sexual sins destroy the relationship with God and others. Proverbs 101 teaches to set no wicked, evil or worthless thing before our eyes and we should walk within our house with a perfect heart. If you have received the Holy Ghost, you are the temple (house) of God. Yet, people take God’s ‘house’ and commit sexual sins in secret and come to church openly and ‘worship loudly’ trying to prove they are spiritual!
The church is nurturing hypocrisy by not addressing sexual sins on a regular basis, not with just saying, “Don’t sin!” but explaining the Biblical, physical, emotional and spiritual ramifications of these sins. Porn use is pervasive among us in all types and forms. Many computer games have sexual stimulating activities. What is fed to the eyes imprints on the heart, mind and soul of a person. The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life consume that person. Satan has come to kill, steal and destroy and he is doing a great job of it right under the eyes of church leadership. Sexual sins also create damaging anger because of a guilty heart that lashes out to others.
I said above that we are advocating hypocrisy. The church is emphasizing the physical ‘worship’ response in church as the evidence of being spiritual, but it encourages the sinning church person to live a lie. Anyone who desires to impress others outwardly can shout, dance, run isles, and even pray in tongues. I’ve been told by people who have sexual addictions, “I know how to act Pentecostal. I know what to do to make others think I’m spiritual.” This is hypocrisy!
This is why we are losing many of our young people. They are raised on the pews, but they see, hear and know about the hypocrisy. They turn away from the church not understanding a thing about developing an intimate relationship with God because they do not see it in the home and do not hear the Word of God taught in the church in a way that touches their heart and gives them examples how to live godly moment by moment. They are not ‘Word feeders’ – they do not see their parents daily reading God’s Word or praying daily.
I counsel adults and young people. When I share about living in a God-conscious state of mind, they do not have a clue what I’m talking about. The Word of God was taught and lived before me by example from childhood. I learned through God’s Word that my every, thought, feeling and action were known by God and He desired to be in an intimate relationship with me where I filtered all I did through Him.
We are to be holy as He is holy. This is holiness of the heart. Out of the heart come the issues of life. Proverbs 4:23-27 (MSG) 23-27 “Keep vigilant watch over your heart; that’s where life starts. Don’t talk out of both sides of your mouth; avoid careless banter, white lies, and gossip. Keep your eyes straight ahead; ignore all sideshow distractions. Watch your step, and the road will stretch out smooth before you. Look neither right nor left; leave evil in the dust.”
We are fooling ourselves if we think we can be feeding ourselves sexual stimulation through porn use and all other sexual distractions and be right with God. His Word tells us we are drawn away from Him by our own lust! He also says to make no provision for the flesh. This is talking about any type of sin that satisfies the flesh. Porn use is a self-induced chemical addiction causing brain dysfunction that affects the body. Porn users tell me this is true. It destroys the normal God-given instincts to be aroused for the gift of sex within marriage. Most importantly, it destroys the soul!
The statistics of porn usage among believers are in the 70 percentile! Do these issues stir anyone else’s heart? I’m I the only one involved in a teaching and counseling ministry concerned about this? God has given me this ministry of teaching and counseling His Word. I’m impelled by God to speak His truth!
Pastors, please contact me. Let’s talk about this problem. I find people are hungry for God’s truth and direction. They are miserable in their sins and do not know how to break the sinful addictions or be healed from abuse that they experienced. Many porn users were sexual abuse victims.
Preachers will say, “The church is a hospital for the hurting.” Are we really? Salvation removes sins, but does not remove life experiences or emotional pain. Isaiah 61 shared the good news of salvation was coming, but in addition God says He desires to heal the broken in heart and set the captives free. Many people are imprisoned in their emotional pain and addictions even after they experience an Acts 2 salvation. Is the church providing qualified God-based counseling and teaching God’s Word rightly applying His truth to help heal the wounded heart?
I’m 70 years young, 61 years baptized in the Holy Ghost, over 50 years teaching God’s Word, 24 years as a Certified Pastoral Counselor and married 46 years to an ordained minister. I’m counseling people daily who are saved, but deeply wounded from all of the above reasons. I wrote a book: God’s Design for Marriage that explains through God’s Word how marriage is a blueprint on earth of God’s plan as He is our Bridegroom and the church collectively is His Bride. Our marriages in the church should be the most loving fulfilled marriages and yet because of sexual sins and ignorance of God’s Word, many marriages are broken sitting on church pews trying to put on a smiling face.
I pray this article of God’s truth will touch hearts that are hurting to know that God has healing answers for spiritual brokenness. It’s through knowing God’s truth and being willing to surrender all to God – heart, soul, mind and body that one can walk in truth and victory.
Teaching God’s anointed Word is my heartbeat to help others grow and heal spiritually, emotionally and relationally for churches and conferences. I provide Holy Ghost, Bible based counseling nationwide by phone/Skype (636) 448-0121 for pastors and lay people.
Go to my website: www.carolclemans.org – read bio, 290+ articles, teaching CD’s & DVD’s are available, book: God’s Design for Marriage in soft cover or eBook: amazon.com. carol@carolclemans.org – (636) 448-0121.
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